Putting my money where my mouth is...

This entry launches my new teaching blog. Today, my students and I had a wonderful discussion about what we want our class to be and how we want to proceed with our semester's work. First, I asked students to freewrite and to think about the kinds of things they would like to change or set into motion in regard to our class. All of this has been spurred by a reading from Paola Freire, from his book "Pedagogy of the Oppressed."

I was fascinated to see what the students would come up, so, first they wrote, and then I asked them to get into groups to chat about their ideas. I wanted the groups to elect a spokesperson who would summarize the conversation, this way, students who had gripes or criticisms wouldn't feel as though they couldn't speak their mind (or so I hoped--let's be real, there is no way to completely neutralize the power relationship between the students and I, nor should one try to).

After the groups had some time to talk, I asked the spokespeople to share some of the ideas or criticisms. I was pleased to find that a number of the students had good things to say about the class (or perhaps they just felt as though they couldn't be truthful, that the situation was too contrived). One of the ideas that came up, and this was, by far, my favorite moment in the class today, was when a quieter student, serving as his group's spokesperson, suggested that, if students were going to be required to keep a blog on their college experiences as students, I, too, should consider keeping a blog on mine as a teacher. So, here is that blog.

What I appreciated or enjoyed about the class today was the feeling that we were in the process of creating something new, different, and interesting. Well, we have the potential to create something new, different, and interesting, who knows what we will actually create. Judging my some of the comments, it seemed as though some students weren't really looking for that much change--more discussions, they said. More student-to-student discussions, too. They wanted me to continue my role as a facilitator, perhaps not wanting to have all responsibility for class discussions placed on their shoulders. This, especially, I found interesting. One student said something along the lines of wanting me to continue guiding discussions so that "things wouldn't get to awkward." Next to the suggestion/request that I keep a blog, I found this to be among the most interesting moments of the class. What did she mean by this, exactly? "Too awkward"?

It's funny, in discussion-based classes, there's always this tension--how much should the professor lead, how much should the class take the lead. And during those moments when the professor tries to hand off the responsibility for keeping the conversation going, it can sometimes get really quiet. I think that's what this student meant by "awkward." Whenever this happens, inevitably, the most outgoing and gregarious students (and there are always a few) will pipe up and help everyone out by trying to kick start the conversation. But, generally, I think that quiet in the classroom is often perceived as a bad thing, as uncomfortable, as awkward. And this can be true for students and professors.

It took me a long time to get used to and comfortable with quiet. When I first started teaching, I felt as though I had to fill the entire class session with talk. I sometimes tell the story, and I'm embarrassed to tell it here, but when I first taught a college course, previous to the first day of the semester, I mapped out the first 5-7 weeks of class periods in 5 and 10 minute increments. I was THAT concerned that we were going to run out of things to talk about! I look back on that now and laugh. But at the time, there was this real fear of...what if no one says anything? What if we run out of things to say to each other? What if the activities I planned fall apart? As things turned out, the students had plenty to say and classes flew by. By the end of the first week, I had thrown my five weeks of scripts in the trash.

Today, it's often the same thing--time goes by. I don't have to find ways to fill it. I have to find ways to get to the things I want to get to. Today's class was a good example--we spent 5 minutes writing, 10 minutes in small groups, discussing, and and hour and five minutes talking about our plans going forward. We never even got to the two activities I had planned for the class--a discussion of the Preface and first chapter of My Freshmen Year, by Rebekkah Nathan and a writing activity where students brainstorm on people to interview for their second writing assigment.

As for the silence, I have come to see that it can serve a good purpose. Sometimes, you want students to feel that awkwardness--if no one is saying something, or, if what you're talking about is, itself, confusing or complex or just not at all black-and-white. Perhaps more importantly, people need quiet time to think. New teachers will pose questions, allow a few seconds for someone to respond, and if no one does, they'll answer the question themselves. In this situation, it's often not that students don't have anything to say, it's that they weren't given enough time to think about the question and think how to formulate a response. Silence can be useful, but it takes a while to find out how.

In the meantime, I'm happy to continue to faciliate discussions and feel as though this is my responsibility. I've been trained to do it, have practiced it for some time, and have come to feel that I am good at it. And I enjoy it. So, why not?


Well, I think that's about it for now. Thanks to the group who suggested this. I'm having fun already.